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Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Will The Real Lynn Allen Please Stand Up: The June Edition 2011

Will The Real Lynn Allen Please Stand Up : the June Edition
Yo and hello to all my readers I want to say I hope that everyone had a great month. I am currently
on vacation enjoying my time off. Between the crazy changes at my day time job and the need to
seriously consider employment elsewhere, it was time for a break. So I took a vacation and have to
say that I really missed my best friend, Corinna. I dedicate this edition partially to Boston. I also want
to dedicate to the troops that are overseas; we thank you for risking your freedom to protect us. In
addition, I want to let you know about a blessing that has come my way. My webpage for my blog is
fully operational. All editions of my blog will be on www.thereallynnallen.blogspot.com, please make
sure to subscribe to my page for short stories and my blog, I would greatly appreciate more comments
and my readers opinions on topics they would like to be brought up. Finally I would like to give birthday
shout outs to my peoples Julie Waitman, Marquita Palmer, RaShaun “Scope Kid” Wilson, Kevin Jordan,
Jamil Winfield, Alex Brown, Quiana Hairston, and Chris “NC” Ross, may god continue to bless each of
you.
The Rules of Boston
What can I honestly say here? Boston was both entertaining and educational. It is one of the most
beautiful cities that I have ever had the pleasure of laying eyes on; however there were a few cons. First
off my head hurt listing to all of those definitive Yankee vowels. I got a kick out of watching everyone
pronounce the word Car (Ka-ARE) as Ca (Ca –Ah). The roads are completely effed up. The pot holes are
so damn big you could take a bath in them (not that you would want to). If Charlotte PD where in Boston
they would not have a problem meeting their quota for the month b/c there would be too many moving
violations to count. The interstate was not any better, you have all these crazy people that just drive on
the shoulder of the road as I’m watching all the speed demons on the road just whisk past and not even
think twice, one thing comes to mind: Who the hell is giving all of these people licenses? My personal
favorite thing was just watching people cut us off without putting on the turn signal. Yes, I know I know,
I am aware that there are some people in charlotte who do that frequently, in the glorified state of
Massachusetts, everyone just thinks that the turn signal is just a pretty light that was added to their auto
mobile for show. Fact: the turn signal does serve a purpose, use it in every other state you visit, but in
true Bostonian fashion when you do turn on the signal just make sure you wipe the drool off of your
awe struck face while the car is at a complete stop.
How the Doctor Got His Groove Back
Ok, I was watching this news story on tv about a doctor who is facing charges for raping the nurse
that works at his office. Stories like this make me a little nervous to go in for a checkup. A doctor is
a shady profession anyway, If you are a doctor, then feel free to prove me wrong. Let’s examine the
fact, half of you men out there that are doctors stumbled into that profession because it would give you
an excuse to feel a girl up. I think that it is disgusting, what makes you some damn interesting at the
job that I would want to sleep with you? I’m pretty sure that we all are the object of someone’s crazy
office fantasy that makes me want to start having security escort me to my car, (then again security is
looking pretty suspect now a days). So to you doctors that feel it’s cool to rape a fellow co worker, just
remember the vows you took, “Do no harm.” Perhaps we should have them add in “Do no nurses.”
Parents at Graduations
Who knew that mothers could be so vicious when it comes to their child graduating, and I can attest to
that. I could never understand how a parent could be the one stressed about their child’s graduation
because after all, they have to do nothing except sit there and scream “that’s my baby” into the crowd
when the name gets called. At least that is what was thought until I spent five days with my best
friend’s mother. It was the most exciting, crazy, stressful time ever, and I loved every minute of it. I
know in high school it doesn’t seem to matter much, college is a different story. When a parent spends
a fortune on classes that help their child obtain a piece of paper that says that they are ready for the
world and a new life, of course they are going to take an interest. This one lady got Mad at Roxie (Cori’s
mom) for not letting her stand in the seat that she was saving to take a photo. He made this big deal
about how her child was graduating; I wanted to let her know that her kid was not the only important
one. I have to say the thing that bothered me the most was this was a private school and I’m seeing
people walk around in tube socks and sweat pants. How embarrassing is it to stand there on one of
the most important days of your child’s life looking like a third rate citizen? Does that mean that you’re
going to show up to their wedding wearing crocks and an oversized white tee? So I’m guessing that you
spent all the money on your kids education, you couldn’t go get a cheap suit on credit? I got two words
for you people EPIC FAIL!!
Tattoos Equals Interesting Stories
I love when I meet people with tattoos. Believe it or not, but they are actually good conversation
starters. While I was getting a mani/pedi today I notice the lady next to me had a very interesting ankle
piece. I commented that I liked it and it lead to the store of her having to get the original one covered
up because she was drunk at a party and just happened to cross paths with a guy with a tattoo gun. I
love tattoos; there is something about them that shows just how artsy people can be. The biggest turns
off about tattoos are name tattoos. It astounds me when I see girls my age and younger walking around
with some dude’s name on them. Why would you put a dude’s name on you unless it was your daddy,
or a relative that has died? So when I ask If the guy has her name tattooed anyone on his person, I hear
nothing but crickets in the background. So to you women that are walking around with some guys name
on your chest, and he is nowhere to be found, I would say I hope that he was worth it b/c I hear that
laser removal costs a fortune and hurts like a bitch.
Learning to Read Between the Lines
So I was talking to one of my girlfriends today and she asked the question of when I need something
from LJ, how do I get it? I was a little curious on this one, and asked her to elaborate. So the example
was if I needed money how would I go about asking him for it? I told my friend that I would just ask.
She then shakes her head at me with such disbelief and says that she doesn’t feel like she should have
to ask. I felt like I needed some clarification. She stated that if she needed something that she would
just say: “so my car is running low on gas.” And the guy is suppose to read between the lines and say;
“ok boo, let me pay for that for you?” I find that laughable because, gents, I hate to say it, but you guys
don’t really read between the lines. Dropping hints is just not the way to go. I find that men are straight
shooters, you tell them what you want and they give it to you if they have it. Some would consider this
concept as taking all the romance out of things. I would say that if I needed money then I’m gonna ask
for it, but if LJ would want to get me a gift then I would not be opposed to him buying me something
in the 24k gold category. See, with us women we can tell when a man wants something without
having to ask for it because we have this sixth since about things, if you don’t know then you better ask
somebody.
To conclude I would really love it if everyone visited my blog page and left comments and leave some
ideas for the next one. Until next time..

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